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Saturday, January 7, 2012

Older Sibling Regression

 We were warned of the incoming regressive behavior that Bubs 1 was going to display after Bubs 2 arrived, but we didn't realize the extent of how far Bubs 1 is willing to take it. We are receiving word that Bubs 1 is being "aggressive" with his classmates at his preschool. He has also been showing some of this aggression at home. Aggression that I look forward to him ditching soon - very soon.

But that's not all.

Bubs 1 also is displaying a sweet side of his regressive behavior... like commandeering his little brother's crib. To be fair, this crib did use to be the Bubs 1's sleeping area. However, it is no longer his primary bedstead.

In an attempt to show Bubs 1 that we are "listening" to him, we decided to let him take his nap in the crib today. He said, "I want to lay in (Bubs 2)'s crib." So he did. Not only that, but he found Bubs 2's binky (a newborn binky) and stuck it in his mouth. To me, his sticking that binky in his mouth was the ultimate show in marking one's territory. This behavior is just one step higher than urinating in the corner of the crib.

I happened to be watching when he woke. He picked his head up and wearily surveyed his surroundings, smirked, and layed his head back down in triumph!

6 comments:

  1. Damn, I am sorry to hear he is taking this so hard. I know it is majorly stressful for you two. How do you discipline a child that is acting out like that??? I hope we don't have to deal with it to this extent when we have another. Thinking of all four of you..

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  2. I read once that when something like that happens, a good idea might be to make sure to spend time alone playing with the older kid (something like 10 minutes a day), to let him know he's not just one of two, but his own person, and as important to you as ever.

    I try to do it in my house too, but it's not always easy, logistically. Might be worth a try, though.

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  3. Good suggestion Blogger Dad and will do too. Matt - thanks for the support, but one question... does an older sibling, say 21 years older, display similar signs? :) If you and Angel have your second one sooner than later, then you may be able to avoid this possibility (according to our friends who have a 3 and a 20-month old)...

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  4. Good luck! Poor Bubs. He just needs to be reassured, but his behavior is rather fascinating.

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  5. his behavior is interesting indeed. he forces us to evaluate our own steps constantly.

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  6. Awww poor guy! I love the "marking territory" thing lol. Damian's regression was peeing in his pants suddenly when he was potty trained a few months prior to Maxwell's birth. Talk about marking your territory lol.

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