Raising Future Giants Fans

I'm not sure if the Bubs 1 even knows what football is, but I do catch him watching a game on any given Sunday. If he is a fan, then I hope he becomes a Giants fan.

I'm doing my part in socializing him to be a Big Blue fan-atic... Bubs 2 too.

Bubs 1 owns a long-sleeve thermal shirt with the NYG logo, he owned a NYG little skully (which was lost in his preschool... made dad angry), he owns a Big Blue ball cap and his pediatrician even has a Giants poster in his office (pictured right).

It was easy to be a football fan where I grew up. I grew up in a NY Giants culture. Most of my friends and I all played football - and we all loved the Giants. We played pick-up Nerf football games after school and even donned the shoulder pads for a local "pop-warner" league.

There were so many Giants fans around me as a kid, I thought everybody like the Gmen. That is, until I found out that my Uncle Mike was a Jets fan. He was the first Jets fan I ever met. Since then, I've found out that I have other family members who are Jets fans too: Uncle Bill, Aunt Katie and cousins Stacey, Bill, Johnny, (Amy?), Jimmy, Kevin... there are just too many to list. Actually, I just don't want to waste anymore space on my blog talking about the - (gag) - Jets.

I'll just be sure to keep an eye on both the Bubs during family "get-togethers" and make sure he doesn't spend too much time with the Jets crowd... just in case it's contagious.

The Sleeping Sibling

Bubs 2

Bubs 1

These two bubs have many similarities, but I'm confused over which one was easier to get to sleep. The bubs' mom thinks my memory is selective, because I remember bubs 1 being very easy to put down between feedings. She thinks the opposite. Aren't all our memories selective? I distinctly remember how I got bubs 1 to sleep. We had a system and it operated with the consistency of a fine-tuned Swiss watch. Looking back, I can remember that as soon as bubs1 was done with his feeding, I wrapped (swaddled) him tight (hog tie-like) in a Miracle Blanket, popped in a binky and turn on the static (white noise). Presto - sleeping bubs1. That bubs was asleep before I placed him down. I sweat on it!

However, bubs 2 operates on another system - one that I have not yet fully discovered.

I feel like my senses are sharp as I collect data on bubs2's transition to sleep. I notice everything he does, and does not do, when watching this monkey drift towards unconsciousness. My senses are so sharp that it is to the point that if I am holding bubs2 to the north (versus northwest) and he falls asleep - I'll figure it out. No needle too small for this haystack-of-a-detective. I continually think about this as I hover above bubs 2's crib. I hover with a binky in one hand and the volume dial, of the static-playing radio, in the other. Trying to find the right blend of tools to send this kid to la-la land is my goal.

Currently, all indicators are targeting the binky.

Bubs 2

Bubs 2 hasn't taken to the binky as well as bubs 1 and this adds to my work in getting him to sleep. I need to convince bubs 2 on the joys of the binky. Once I have this accomplished, there will be peace. Until then, I'm going to continue to hover. I will continue my vigilance.

Bubs2 will take the binky - and power will be all mine again. muhaha...

Toddler Bribery

   

Helping to socially develop Bubs 1 has been challenging at times. Other times, it's clicked like clock work. For example, his mom and I are helping him learn how to sit at the dinner table - and stay in his seat. We know that a typical three-year-old doesn't have the ability to stay stationary for too long on his own, so we bribe him. Bribery is such a negative term, so let's say "reward" instead. Bribery, I mean a reward system, starts early and never ends. Quid pro quo.

During dinner, we've instituted the "five-minute-(inject reward here)" game. Over the past couple of evenings, we have been bribing (uh uhm, rewarding) Bubs 1 with these little, bite-sized fruit snacks. The Bubs normally requests the "purpool one pwease." By using a timer that offers the time remaining in red, the bubs can simply visualize (and begin to internalize) how long five minutes lasts (a very long time for a 3-year-old). In order to claim his fruit snack, Bubs 1 has to stay in his seat for the full five-minutes - and he does. He is an involved player, because he likes the reward. Sometimes he forgets (since he's only three) and climbs down from his chair until we remind him that he'll lose his reward. This reminder gets him quickly scrambling to get back into his seat.

Today, it's "purpool" fruit snacks. Tomorrow, it's going to be the keys to the car.

Older Sibling Regression

 We were warned of the incoming regressive behavior that Bubs 1 was going to display after Bubs 2 arrived, but we didn't realize the extent of how far Bubs 1 is willing to take it. We are receiving word that Bubs 1 is being "aggressive" with his classmates at his preschool. He has also been showing some of this aggression at home. Aggression that I look forward to him ditching soon - very soon.

But that's not all.

Bubs 1 also is displaying a sweet side of his regressive behavior... like commandeering his little brother's crib. To be fair, this crib did use to be the Bubs 1's sleeping area. However, it is no longer his primary bedstead.

In an attempt to show Bubs 1 that we are "listening" to him, we decided to let him take his nap in the crib today. He said, "I want to lay in (Bubs 2)'s crib." So he did. Not only that, but he found Bubs 2's binky (a newborn binky) and stuck it in his mouth. To me, his sticking that binky in his mouth was the ultimate show in marking one's territory. This behavior is just one step higher than urinating in the corner of the crib.

I happened to be watching when he woke. He picked his head up and wearily surveyed his surroundings, smirked, and layed his head back down in triumph!

No Artificial Teets

The title is "risky," but it's what Westerly Hospital told us, or encouraged us, to avoid when attempting to soothe a crying, just-born Bubs 2. Our first night with the Bubs 2 was a sleepless one, as was the second, third, fourth and so on. Last night, I gave in and gave an artificial teet to Bubs 2. Mom needed some sleep, so the Bubs 2 and I headed downstairs where I stuck the pacifier in his mouth... I then waited for him to fall asleep.

(fast forward 2 hours later)... still waiting...

At least the binky was keeping him from crying temporarily. He was having difficulties keeping it in his mouth. I thought he had a good handle on it. He was chewing away with rhythm and this led me to attempt getting some rest on the couch. However, the binky would fall from his mouth every time and he'd cry. It was a vicious cycle for those couple hours.

Westerly hospital said that an artificial teet can create what's called "nipple confusion." Such a name makes me think of some funny comments, but I'll hold my tongue. Anyway, I don't think that Bubs 2 is experiencing nipple confusion today. He seems to know who's nipple belongs to who. This is the only pic I can find that has Bubs 2 sucking on a binky. This was taken on day two of his life... just before the nurse spotted it in his mouth and lectured us.

Mom and me nodded and went with it, but I did tell our righteous nurse that our first Bub was given a binky from the nursery at UCLA hospital and he didn't experience any nipple confusion. This didn't go over well with the nurse. She responded, "Well, they're not baby friendly." It took me a few hours to realize that this nurse was making reference to a non-profit initiative (http://www.babyfriendlyusa.org), which is a United Nations - global initiative to encourage breastfeeding. I can respect this because the movement seems to reestablish infant nourishment with the mother - and away from the encroaching corporations selling formula, etc.

However, I wouldn't say that UCLA hospital wasn't (isn't) "baby friendly," but I guess there are just simply a lot more artificial teets in southern California.

The Newer Bubs

 Bubs II arrived to us a couple days ago. He entered this world in an east coast hospital, unlike his brother who was born on the west coast. Their deliveries were as different as night and day. Bubs ll's brother, the first Bubs, arrived inside a dimly lit hospital birthing room with soothing music, a midwife and nurses waiting and coaching his mom patiently. I remember a comfortable environment inside the birthing room. There were no meds, no IV, no doctors and thankfully no pain present for the Bub's mom. Using Hypnobirthing techniques, mom was able to "breathe" him down the birth canal. She played an active role in the first Bub's birth.

By contrast, the Bubs ll was a breech baby and our new east coast hospital didn't/doesn't naturally deliver breech babies. Mom was scheduled for an "elected" surgery. Comparatively, the Bubs ll arrived in a very bright room with sounds of vacuums and suction echoing throughout. Mom said she felt like she was on a lift inside a auto mechanic's garage. There were no tranquil sounds waving through this room. Instead of coaching mom, the dr's and nurses held their own conversations. From an observational position, I couldn't identify who the main character of this room was, but I knew it was supposed to be mom. Only the anesthesiologist spoke with mom and he basically was telling her what the dr's were going to do next. An almost scripted process and opposite from anything natural.

 Mom, a.k.a. "the patient" was essentially removed from this birth and the recovery time is tripled. This delivery, i.e. surgery, made me realize how authentic and meaningful the first bub's delivery was.

Why is all this important? I think it's easy to miss, because the mainstream process of childbirth has been successfully relocated inside the medical industry. Don't get me wrong, I understand that there are higher levels of risk that accompany a natural breech birth and medical intervention can help dramatically reduce that risk. However, the medical industry does bring its own risks too. I now understand the anti-medical establishment side in the ongoing debate between the natural birth proponents' wishes to return power back to the mom's as they fight the medical establishment from claiming a non-medical procedure as their domain.

Bubs ll is safely with us today and his big brother loves him. The first bubs identifies the recently erected crib, inside our house, as "(bubs ll's) crib." He knows his new little brother is going to live at our house, which the first bubs refers to as the "blue house." In fact, while getting ready to leave a visit at the hospital to see Bubs ll, the first bubs says, "Come on (bubs ll), let's go to the blue house."

He said it as if they've been brothers for many years rather than just a couple days.

The Bus Stop

 The Bubs has to be outside and ready to board his school bus at 8:30am. He knows to get ready and meet Mr Roland (bus driver) each morning. The Bubs mom and I are amazed that this little guy (at 3 years old) looks forward (as much as he does) to getting on the bus. He's all smiles when the yellow coach rolls down the hill towards the bus stop. He's a social creature who is fast absorbing his surrounding knowledge.

Here's a picture (bottom, left) of the Bubs, and the Bubs' mom and me, all waiting for Mr Roland to arrive at the Bubs' bus stop last week. We had fun hanging out and anticipating the big yellow bus' arrival. It's a good time for us to tell the Bubs what he's going to expect for the day, i.e. Mr Roland is coming to pick you up and then you're going to go to school and Ms Crocker's room, etc.). Having a plan for the day makes the day more meaningful.

The other picture (top, right) is of my bus stop when I was a kid. This is where I began my relationship with school - on the corners of Highland Lakes and Canadawa roads. Unlike the Bubs, I didn't start boarding a school bus until I was 5 years old. Just as the research suggests, kids who attend pre-school exhibit greater academic benefits later on in their academic careers. I "missed the bus" on attending pre-school (pun intended). My grandmother said that I was a "late bloomer" (just as many of the males in my family were), but I think it had more to do with me having less-access to educational resources early in life (combined with an unstable family later on). Perhaps even some public-school-tracking played a small part in there too. At the end of the day, the Bubs' mom and I are already offering more educational access for the little guy (and his soon-to-be-brother too!).

Since family stability and access to resources are available to the Bubs, we're planning on a meaningful academic experience for him... and this is what it looks like.